


I Want My Matt Back

by canufeelthemagictonight



Category: Escape the Night (Web Series), I Want My Hat Back - Jon Klassen, Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Character Death, Children's book, Cinnamon Roll, Corpses, Crack, Cute, Escape the Night Spoilers, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Friendship, Gen, Happy Ending, Male-Female Friendship, Not Serious, Parody, Resurrection, Ro misses Matt, Silly, and everyone else tries to help her
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-01
Updated: 2018-11-01
Packaged: 2019-08-11 12:54:51
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 430
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16475951
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/canufeelthemagictonight/pseuds/canufeelthemagictonight
Summary: Rosanna has lost her Matt, and she wants him back.An Escape the Night one-shot. A parody of the children's book "I Want My Hat Back" by Jon Klassen.





	I Want My Matt Back

**Author's Note:**

> This idea just popped into my head. Consider it a strange sneak peek at the next novel chapter, except not really. If I could draw, I would totally also draw a picture of this, but I can't, so I won't.

I WANT MY MATT BACK  
by Rosanna Pansino

ROSANNA: My Matt is gone. I want him back.

_Rosanna approaches Nikita._

ROSANNA: Have you seen my Matt?  
NIKITA: No, I haven't seen your Matt.  
ROSANNA: Okay. Thank you anyway.

_Rosanna approaches Joey._

ROSANNA: Have you seen my Matt?  
JOEY: No. I have not seen any Matts around here.  
ROSANNA: Okay. Thank you anyway.

_Rosanna approaches the Strong Man._

ROSANNA: Have you seen my Matt?  
THE STRONG MAN _(hastily shoving Matt's battered corpse behind his back)_ : No. Why are you asking me? I haven't seen him. I haven't seen any Matts anywhere. I would not kill a Matt. Don't ask me any more questions.  
ROSANNA: Okay. Thank you anyway.

_Rosanna approaches Colleen._

ROSANNA: Have you seen my Matt?  
COLLEEN: I haven't seen anything all day. I have been trying to figure out what Joey's doing.  
ROSANNA: Do you want me to keep an eye on him?  
COLLEEN: Yes, please. But don't trust him. He will probably try and kill everyone.

_Rosanna approaches Manny._

ROSANNA: Have you seen my Matt?  
MANNY: I knew a Matt once. He was cute and smart, but then I beat him at arm wrestling.  
ROSANNA: I don't want to be reminded of that. Thank you anyway.

_Rosanna approaches Tyler._

ROSANNA: Have you seen my Matt?  
TYLER: What is a Matt?  
ROSANNA: ...thank you anyway.

_Rosanna lies down on the floor and stares at the ceiling._

ROSANNA: Nobody has seen my Matt. What if I never see him again? What if nobody ever finds him? My poor Matt. I miss him so much.

_Safiya walks into the room and notices that Rosanna is sad._

SAFIYA: What's the matter?  
ROSANNA: I have lost my Matt. And nobody has seen him.  
SAFIYA: What does your Matt look like?  
ROSANNA: He has brown hair and kind eyes and...

_Everything is red._

ROSANNA: **I have seen my Matt.**

_Rosanna runs past Safiya, Tyler, Manny, Colleen, Joey, and Nikita. She points at the Strong Man._

ROSANNA: **You. You _killed_ my Matt.**

_Rosanna uses the leather band to cleanse the artifact. The Strong Man dies. Then, the group uses the Harp of Lazarus, and Matt comes back to life. Rosanna and Matt share a hug._

ROSANNA: I love my Matt.

_Veronica shows up._

VERONICA: Excuse me, have you seen the Strong Man?  
ROSANNA: No. Why are you asking me? I haven't seen him. I haven't seen any Strong Men anywhere. I would not kill a Strong Man, because I am an innocent cinnamon roll. Don't ask me any more questions.  
VERONICA: Okay. Thank you anyway.

**Author's Note:**

> I love Matt and Rosanna. That is all.


End file.
